Love Yourself NOW! + OOTD

So if you've read some of my past entries, you know that I've struggled with loving myself, my body, and just general self positivity. I knew I wanted to lose weight, and I knew I would be happier at a smaller size, but I didn't want to wait until I was at that smaller size to start loving myself! That's no way to live. I've struggled and tried to like my body, and suddenly, today...I did.

This is me, a size 18, with a tummy, wearing a crop top and high waisted skirt. This is me holding up my arm, which is not thin. This is me showing skin. This is me, with all my faults and flaws...actually thinking that I am still cute.

I don't know why it started, honestly. There was no distinct trigger that set these feelings in motion. This morning I just woke up, put on what you see, and I, for the first time in maybe EVER, felt 100% comfortable in my skin. I still want to lose weight and get in shape, of course. But now, in my "before" state, I like my body. Wow.

I may not be plus size forever. I don't intend to be. But while I am, I hope to use my confidence and such to help others feel the same way I feel. Whether you're 90 lbs or 500 lbs, you deserve to LOVE YOURSELF!

Unfortunately, I can't give too many too many tips on how to love yourself, seeing as it just seemingly suddenly happened to me. Care for yourself. Put on the lotions, the balms, the serums. Make your baths extra long and add in some nice scented candles. Look at yourself and know that this you is the only you that you have. It's okay to change your body, but your body now is still yours.

If you ever need to talk, I am here~ I hope that you're having a wonderful day and you have love for yourself!!

My Week + April Favorites Video!!

Shot from an OOTD video I filmed~

So I decided to do kind of an Instagram roundup/my week type post! I'm also trying to find the balance between making blog and vlog posts. It seems like when I make lots of one, I neglect making any of the other. I'm going to try getting myself on an actual schedule for making blog posts and videos. For now, I'm going to get back into the blogging swing of things with a simple post, but my next post is going to be my internet purchases post!

Here's a preview of said post - my amazing smiley bag from Aliexpress! I can't wait to take lots of pictures of it and talk all about how amazing it is!!

So this week I've had lots and lots and lots of migraines, practically back to back. I think it's just seasonal allergy type migraines, but I've never experienced this before. However, I've wanted to get dressed up and film a lot this week, so I have! My bestie bought a few things for me, and I wanted to show them off! Also, I've loved playing with my hair; it's finally at the length where I can DO things with it again! 

As I said, I want to find a balance between blogging and vlogging, but I'm really, really into vlogging right now. I don't know why, I've just been having so much fun and getting some very nice comments, and I've also been finding some really nice people to follow (mostly plus size vloggers)!

When I haven't been vlogging or laying down trying to alleviate my headaches, I've been playing loads of Animal Crossing New Leaf! I've been earning loads and loads of bells to get Gracie's Princess series of furniture, as well as her nice clothing items! When I'm not playing Animal Crossing, I'm also playing Pokemon Rumble and Pokemon Shuffle! 

I've also discovered how amazing Tsum Tsum is - both the actual plushies and the app! I love playing the game so much, it's much too addicting, and it's only making me realize how cute everyone is and I want to buy them all! 

I guess mostly, though, I've been just trying to unwind and hope that I feel better. I have a lot of things I want/need to get to and not being able to look at light/stand noises isn't very productive. I feel like I'm being lazy! I took a long bath with a candle and bath fizzy the other night to try and feel better and I think it really helped! I did have to skip out on something today because of the migraines, but I feel like they're coming less frequently.

And today, I also felt just really...body lovin'. Like, I actually LIKED my body. I've always had problems liking my body, especially my areas that carry the most weight, but today I actually felt allover cute! I know that liking and loving yourself can be hard, but it's a wonderful feeling to have, even if it's fleeting. I hope that you give yourself a hug and a smile today, okay?

Lastly, here's my April Favorites video! I hope you enjoy, and have a great day!!

Learn to Love Yourself

Isabelle wears what makes her happy no matter what anyone thinks!

Self love is something that I struggle with often. I focus more on my flaws then I do on the positives. A lot of times when I look in the mirror, I do not see a girl, but a monster. I see fatness and ugliness, a weird voice and messed up thoughts. I don't see creative and pretty. Sometimes I hate going out because the thought of people looking at me makes me want to cry. But who cares what they think!!

Yet I preach often that everyone, no matter what, is beautiful and everyone should love themselves. So why do I exclude myself??

I keep thinking once I lose X amount of weight, I'll be happy with myself. But if I'm not happy with myself now, will I really be happy then? Won't I just keep focusing on the flaws, still?

I am trying. I am trying to love myself the way I am. I don't know where this self hatred stems from, but I want to CRUSH it. So, I wrote down some self love thoughts and quotes that I am trying to live by; hopefully some of them will help you as well!

Take care of yourself. Eat something healthy, hydrate yourself, take a bubble bath.

Do more of what makes you happy - gaming, drawing, etc.

Would you say the same things you're saying about yourself to another person? No? Then why is it okay to say these things to yourself?

Every day is a new opportunity.

You say "Everyone is beautiful," this means YOU are beautiful!

Life is NOT a competition.

Chill out.

Celebrate every victory, big or small.

Forgive yourself.

It's OKAY to like - even love - yourself!

Face your inner and outer obstacles.

The past is the past for a reason.

Accept where you are right now.

Practice the love you aspire to receive

"The lies you believe are what keep you from embracing the beauty you've beheld this whole time"

"There is this nagging voice in my head that tells me I can't but I think I'll hold on a little longer and prove it wrong."

You are not your mistakes or faults.

You have nothing to prove.

Start TODAY. Not when you lose weight, not when you acquire X, NOW.

Focus on what you have, not what you lack.

Believe you are the best you. It's true!

Dress, act, and do what you like (as long as it's not hurting others!) no matter what anyone thinks.

I hope some of these, you take to heart and write them down somewhere, keep it, and read it often. I have mine in my journal, bookmarked so I can turn to it every morning and read these things. The journey to loving yourself does not happen overnight and I'm sure I'll be making another post on this subject at a later time as I face my own self loathing. But bit by bit, I hope both you and I can learn to love ourselves no matter what size we are and no matter where we are in life and be happy every day.

Selfie from a few days ago. I give you all hugs and kisses! 

~Bunny